Freedom

Today at 10am I was made redundant for the first time in my life.  Initially I was shocked and ashen, but as the day wore on and the more people I talked to (fellow redundantees and the 'still employed') the more OK I felt.  Maybe I will crash and burn (maybe not - this is not guaranteed to happen - I'm not going to make it happen!) but so far I am dealing with it and reacting far better than I expected.

It is one of those few events that (a) I never imagined would happen to me and (b) if it did I would deal with it VERY badly.  Well it has and I'm dealing with it.

Compare and contrast: Epilepsy diagnosis and loss of driving license.  Hmmm.  To quote me "you can get used to anything".  This is however financially very destabilizing.  Epilepsy wasn't.  That's what I was so scared of.  Being destitute.  

I now need to find employment.  It is forced rather than leisurely.  But, critically, this isn't the case at all.  I don't have to get a job.  I have financial resources (redundancy and otherwise).  I can redesign my life.  I am going to redesign my life.  Why not.  It was coming anyway.  I've been talking about it for long enough.

That aside, I have learned in the space of a few hours who my friends are, and the high level of support that they bring.  There were no surprises in who contacted me.